Sending our Love
Dear Bill, I miss you. This does not get easier. No amount of joy could ever take away the pain of losing you. I get better at managing it as time goes on, but it is still really hard. Today is Blake's birthday. You became a father 15 years ago and you crushed fatherhood in every way possible for those short nine years. I know being a dad was one of your greatest joys in life and I am so sorry that was taken from you so soon. Along with everything else. I am doing what I can for the boys and sometimes I feel like it just isn't enough. A long time ago I resigned to the fact that I cannot be you. They are all growing up so much and you would be so proud of them. Blake is on the edge of manhood and it is shocking. He is taking driver's ed right now, which terrifies me. It will take nearly everything I have not to wrap him in bubble wrap from head to toe once he actually starts driving. I measured him today and he is almost 4 inches taller than me and has...