5 years
Dear Bill, It has been five years. Five years that feels like a lifetime. They say at some point we will think of our loved ones who have died and smile instead of cry. I am not there yet. Every photo, every video, and so many memories tug at my heartstrings and I cannot help but to well up with tears and wish that I could wrap my arms around you. I miss you. This is so hard. I feel like I should be getting my five year pin or something. Although, let's be real here, a pin would be a completely inadequate token for what I have been through. Maybe an all expenses paid trip to the greek isles? That seems more appropriate. I am still haunted by the memory of three-year-old Owen asking repeatedly, "Where's my daddy? Is daddy at work? When is daddy coming home?" This went on for several weeks. How do you explain death to a three-year-old? What a mind-fuck that must have been for him. It was for all of us really, and still is in many ways. The actuality of your d...