New Year
Dear Bill, It is New Years Day, 2020. The holidays have come and gone, along with your birthday. It's a new year, with the potential for growth, change, and new possibilities. And another year we will navigate without you. This is all still very hard and I know by now that that will never change. The grief and pain has become a part of all of us who miss you, in varying degrees. When I think of my own grief, it just sort of feels like a horrifying, inoperable tumor. Sometimes I feel bad about this, because it makes me seem somehow tainted or not whole. But I know that this is not really true. They say that those who have been in the darkness are better able to appreciate all that shines. That is true for me. I see the world through a different lens now. My perspective on life and all it's experiences has changed, for the better. There is a great deal of sadness that lives in me, but there is also hope, love, excitement and determination for the future. The boys and I travel...